Thanksgiving Without You

Thanksgiving is just a couple days away and I can’t wait. I love gathering with family during the holiday season and seeing family from out of town. Thanksgiving is also a bit of a sad holiday for my family.

For as long as I can remember it’s been a family tradition to go out to Arizona City, to my great grandparents’ house. We’d go out early in the morning and spend the whole day playing horse shoe, cooking amazing food, eating amazing food, watching football & just spending good quality time with family.

Over the years the gatherings got a little smaller, people got married, had kids, went to their in laws instead. Whatever their reasons may be our thanksgiving table was less full each year.

This holiday was always so special to me, because my great grandpa was the greatest. He used to call my Red and I hated it! (I never appreciated my red hair until I was older) this was our holiday together. The first one without him was the hardest. I debated even going because I knew just how much it would hurt. I had to remember that I wasn’t the only one that would feel like Thanksgiving just wasn’t the same. This was the first year for my Papa (the greatest man I know!!) to celebrate a holiday without his dad, the first thanksgiving my great grandma wouldn’t hear her husband’s laugh- he had a very contagious, a very unique laugh that could put a smile on even the most hateful hearts. I can hear that laugh every time I think of him but especially around this time of year.

I don’t think it ever gets easier. It breaks my heart that my youngest babies never had the chance to meet such a great man, but I’m so grateful that my oldest did.

This is to one more year without you grandpa. One more year of never hearing you call me Red. One more year of going to the home you created with the family that you blessed us with. One more year of you watching over us from behind the pearly gates. I could never express how much you are missed by all who knew you and your kindness. I hope you’re proud when you look down on the family and friendships you created.

Happy Thanksgiving!

God Bless,


Family Trip To Vertuccio Farm




Every year we go to a fall festival for the kids to enjoy activities and pick out their pumpkins. This year we heard about a different place so we decided to check it out. We’re so glad we did!


The kids loved it, so did the grown ups! We went with my in laws and husbands sisters. Their were tons of animals for the kids to pet and feed, a corn maze, wagon ride pulled by beautiful horses, a zip line, cow train, and so much more. It was a little Farm compared to where we usually go which made it even better! We were able to do and see everything before closing. It was also spread out really well so there weren’t huge crowds.


We love going to small festivals with small crowds. I have anxiety and can’t stand being in crowded places. The day before we went to Trunk or treat in the center of our little town and people must have came from every corner of the state because we couldn’t walk without bumping shoulders with someone. It was a nightmare! We walked from one end to the other and left. The kids were disappointed and so was I but the lines were so long we would have waited an hour for each activity. We headed home and decided to grab candy and watch a movie at the house. The kids loved it and it made up for the failed plan.


I also ditched the stroller for this big outing and went with my Moby wrap. Baby wearing is still a new experience for me, but I love it! It’s convenient and I don’t have to push the stroller around full of everyone’s crap while carrying the baby. We all know how that is. At least that’s how it’s always been with my kids, they hate strollers if there is someone available to carry them. Having her in the Moby also made for a secure and comfortable nursing experience while out in public. Sure I still got the looks… but I knew that everything was covered and if she did decide to look around I would still be covered. And she did and I was.


Paityn enjoyed the Farm as much as the boys! She loves being outside and she loves animals she looked at all of her surroundings, gibber jabbered the whole time, and of course was full of smiles. The whole day exhausted her and the wagon ride was our last before heading to pick out pumpkins. If the ride was just 5 minutes longer  she would have been asleep. She did end up passing out while walking through the pumpkin patch though which made for an awesome and quiet ride home.



The Vertuccio Farm was a great experience for the whole family, it’s our new go to fall festival!!

The kids left more than happy! The boys got giant pumpkins and Paityn got a small one that we will paint.

I’ll share pictures of the pumpkins all carved and painted in a Halloween post!

God Bless!


Moving Gratitude Post

Alright, so I kind of failed at getting post done the last few days for my gratitude challenge. Of course I have a great excuse though… being a mom. *ha-ha* I’ve decided to move my 100 days of gratitude to my Instagram ( @awildflowermom ) you can catch up with the post over there. I do have a great post I’m working on from our family trip to the farm. It will be overloaded with pictures!! The notification will be up on Instagram when it’s done.



God bless,


Day 5: My Husband

100 days of gratitude: Day 5


I am grateful not just today, but every day for my husband. He has blessed me with a beautiful life and amazing kids. He works hard every day to give us everything that we have. And when he comes home he continues to work hard at making sure the kids and I are happy. He plays with the boys from the second he walks in the door until they all pass out on the couch. He plays with Paityn so that I can finally shower or eat something.  He works 6 days a week so that I can enjoying doing what I was meant to do, be a full time Mommy.

Chris and I have been through a lot together, and everything that we have endured has helped us grow together. He is my rock and my life line. He sees all the sides of me, some not too pretty and he still loves me unconditionally. Marriage is a lot of work, some heartache, lots of headaches, but if you have tons of love and faith you will always pull through. At least we have.

We don’t always follow the rules. Some nights we do go to bed angry, sometimes we can’t find a happy medium, and sometimes we bottle things up until they overflow and we lose our cool. (Mostly me) But what we always do, is love, and forgive, and fight!! We fight hard for what we have and we will never stop fighting. Love is a rollercoaster of emotions. You don’t always have to like each other in order to love each other and trust me, we don’t always like each other!!

Chris is my best friend, he holds my heart and all that comes with the job. The day he stole my whole heart was the day our oldest called him “Dad” and he responded. Chris adopted our oldest son when he was 4 and has raised him as his own ever since. He says that Chase is his blood no matter what the DNA says. He has a heart of gold when it comes to his children, they have always come first to him and I couldn’t be happier with that.

I know that it sounds crazy, even to him it sounds crazy, but I knew that he was the man for me a week after we met at the Fourth of July fireworks. I remember looking at him and thinking “gosh this guy is perfect, he’s the man for me” I felt that warm and fuzziness and just knew it was right.

My love for this man is more than I ever dreamed possible and I am truly grateful for him and our marriage.


Day 4: Family

100 days of gratitude day 4


Today’s gratitude goes to family. Chris and I are very close with our families and we do a lot of  activities with them. Sundays we watch football with his family, Saturdays my family throws Huskers football parties, that we try to attend as often as possible (they’re usually over an hour away from us! -we live in the middle of nowhere!!) We get together with family for camping, festivals, all birthdays and holidays. Like I said very family oriented.

Today the kids and I went to Vintage and Vino with my grandma. Its a vintage market with tons of rustic decor, soaps, candles, baby stuff and more- All handmade. They also have wine and craft beer,  I couldn’t enjoy any of the amazing wine, of course. (I don’t believe in the “pump and dump” and Paityn doesn’t drink a bottle) anyways.. We walked around browsing all of the amazing vendors for a couple of hours and then we went to Target for the kids-the craft show isn’t really their thing, ha! After the kids got what they wanted we headed to lunch and back home where we played board games and rolled around on the floor with the kids.

This evening my in-laws came over to visit with the grand kids- my Father-in law has been out of town for work for a really long time and was dying to see them. Well hes the fixer of… well, everything!! Seriously he can do it all. He even built our beautiful wood bed and really awesome…umm… back board? (I guess you could call it that) for our bedroom TV. Needless to say after he played with the kids for a little while I listed off everything I needed him to fix. The boys are lucky to have him be so handy because he teaches them how to do whatever it is that he’s doing.

Other then just today, we are blessed with an amazing support system. Chris and I both have very close relationships with our Moms. I also have a great bond with my grandma and papa. If we didn’t have our support system I don’t know where we would be whether it be our relationship, financial struggles, the kids or just needing my personal google (my mom haha!) anything and everything. They have been by our sides to guide us and help us better this beautiful life we have created.

My Mom is my biggest support system outside of my husband. I am truly blessed to have a Mom that listens to everything I ramble about. She is there to give advice, to listen to me vent about my frustration or insecurities. She is their to guide me to the right path, to  teach me not to question my heart, to believe in myself and my strengths. If it wasn’t for her, I wouldn’t know how to be a mom.  She is my rock and my best friend. No matter how old I get I will always reach for her!

Today was an all around great family day. Now, I have the baby in bed…scratch that… I hear her. *sigh* and the boys and I are relaxing on the couch watching a show while I try to clear this writers block and get some new post done…

Wish me luck!


Day 3: Staying Home with My Babies

100 Days of Gratitude: Day 3


Today, I am grateful that I am able to stay home with my kids and help them grow. Sure most days its insane, and I sometimes I feel as if i’m going crazy but i wouldn’t change it for the world.

I’ve always dreamed of being a stay at home Momma, and being there for all of my babies milestones. With Chase (my oldest) I was in school when he was hitting all of his milestones as a toddler and with Bentley (middle) I went back to work when he was three months old. I feel like I missed out on a lot. Now I’m able to be here for all of their achievements and all of Paityn’s (baby) firsts.

Being a Stay at home mom is a 24/7 job. No holidays, sick days, breaks, or vacations. It is the best, most rewarding and hardest job I’ve ever had. I get paid in hugs and kisses, I get to raise our children the way we want them raised. We are truly blessed to not have to put them in daycare, or after school care.

let me just say, if you have to or choose to use childcare i understand that every ones situation is different and sometimes childcare is needed. WE just choose not to use it for our children. I had some terrible experiences in day cares when I was growing up and that has modeled me to not believe in sending my children to any. When I was a hairstylist and had to have my children in childcare they stayed with my grandparents. 

I wouldn’t be able to stay home if it wasn’t for my extremely hard working husband. His job is very demanding and sometimes he works 7 days straight 56+ hours a week. He does it everyday just so I am able to stay home with our kids.

Day 2: Sleepy Kids


100 days of gratitude Day 2


Today I am grateful for sleepy kids! It’s the little things, right?!

Paityn hasn’t been sleeping great with all the teething. Plus the cold she had last week. At her 6 month appointment the dr asked me if she was sleeping through the night. I laughed and said “no” He told me that babies at 6 months should be sleeping 10-12 hours a night! What?? My Kids must be broken because they still don’t sleep 10-12 hours a night!

If your baby sleeps through the night for 10 hours please let me in on your secret!

Last night she slept great for the first time in a long time! Not 10-12 hours great, not even 6 hours… but she slept and that means I actually slept. Her gummy smile and belly laugh woke me up at around 8. That’s two hours later than usual and she only woke up once to nurse.

Paityn and I lay in bed and cuddle while I enjoy my huge cup of coffee every morning until the boys get up, today they slept until 10! That’s two episodes of my favorite show, 2 large cups of coffee and tons of cuddles from a very happy baby before actually getting up.

It was a great way to start my day.

Refreshed, fueled, and loved.



If you were wondering if my house stayed clean for just one more day like I prayed for in my last post, of course it didn’t!